The company I work for now uses Nagios, Tivoli, and Splunk. At my previous job we used Sysedge in my department and I believe Openview in others.

I'm sure any of those tools could do what you are asking with some effort on your part even if they can't straight out of the box. They all use SNMP for handling events and communication. You can write scripts defining exactly what you want monitored, then let the tool take care of the alerting, logging, etc. using SNMP. Of course, all come with plenty of pre-built monitors for things many people want to see. But if you want to monitor something they don't have built-in you can always write your own script. For example, with Sysedge at my previous job we wrote a script that listed exact text strings we wanted to monitor in our /var/adm/messages file on Solaris to catch errors specific apps we used generated even though Sysedge couldn't monitor those apps out of the box. You could do the same thing, or hire a consultant or pay the company to write them for you as part of the implementation.

As mentioned before, you could also do it yourself. At my current job we also have a home-grown tool that generates graphs of just about any performance parameter you can see with standard Unix commands. It collects data on each server then runs a lightweight http server so you can use a web browser to see tables or generate graphs. Specific to your needs, it can do pages in and out per second, pagefaults per second and similar data. I don't think it can do it per process though. Although again, since we wrote it ourselves if we needed that data we could adjust the data collection scripts to implement that.

I guess that's just more details in support of my original point. The tools exist to get what you want. But it will probably require modifying a commercial app or writing pieces on your own to get some of the specific things you requested.

As a minor digression - that's part of the difference in philosophy between Unix and Microsoft. Unix tends to give you lightweight but powerful tools. You can do just about anything with them, but you need to do some work to get what you want. Microsoft on the other hand gives you more "complete" and finished tools, but if they don't do exactly what you want them to you're probably out of luck.