What is on Your Mind?

An Aardvark walks into a Bar, and the Bartender says, "Hey! Why the Long Face?!?"

(Not mine. Not sure where it originates.)

An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables, and asks: "Can I join you?"

René Descartes walked into a bar and ordered a drink. When he finished, the bartender asked, "Would you like another?". Descartes replied "I think not." and instantly disappeared from existence.

^^^^

lol

Harking back to a previous post that insisted there are no female SAs I hope I get away with this one from a Think Geek T-shirt:

Code:

$> man woman
$> Segmentation fault (core dumped)

Two engineers were riding in a hot air balloon. They were blown off course and were completely lost. They finally saw a guy on the ground and they shouted "Can you tell us where we are?" After a few minutes, the guy yelled back "You're up in a balloon." One engineer said to the other, "Just our luck to run into a mathematician". The other engineer responded, "How do you know he was a mathematician?" "Well, in the first place he took a long time to answer; second, his answer was 100% correct; and third, it was totally useless."

A game warden came upon a duck hunter who had bagged 3 ducks and decided to "enforce the laws pending".

He stopped the hunter, flashed his badge and said, "Looks like you've had a pretty good day. Mind if I inspect your kill?"
The hunter shrugged and handed the ducks to the warden.

The warden took one of the ducks, inserted his finger into the duck's butt, pulled it out, sniffed it, and said, "This here's a Washington state duck. Do you have a Washington state hunting license?"
The hunter pulled out his wallet and calmly showed the warden a Washington state hunting license.

The warden took a second duck, inserted another finger in the bird's butt, pulled it out, sniffed it, and said, "This here's an Idaho duck. Do you have an Idaho state hunting license?"
The hunter, getting annoyed, produced an Idaho state hunting license.

The warden took a third duck, conducted the same finger test, and said,
"This here's an Oregon state duck. Do you have an Oregon state hunting license?"
Once again, only this time more aggravated, the hunter produced the appropriate license.

The warden, a little disappointed at having struck out, handed the ducks back to the hunter and said, "You've got all of these licenses, just where the hell are you from?"

The hunter dropped his pants, bent over, and said "You're so smart, YOU tell ME!"