CONDOM(1)                                                     General Commands Manual                                                    CONDOM(1)

NAME

       condom - protection against viruses and prevention of child processes

SYNOPSIS

       condom [options] [processid]

DESCRIPTION

       condom  provides  protection  against  System  Transmitted Viruses (STVs) that may invade your system.  Although the spread of such viruses
       across a network can only be abated by aware and cautious users, condom is the only highly  effective  means  of  preventing  viruses  from
       entering  your  system (see celibacy(1)).  Any data passed to condom by the protected process will be blocked, as specified by the value of
       the -s option (see OPTIONS below).  condom is known to defend against the following viruses and other malicious afflictions:

              o      AIDS
              o      Herpes Simplex (genital varieties)
              o      Syphilis
              o      Crabs
              o      Genital warts
              o      Gonhorrea
              o      Chlamydia
              o      Michelangelo
              o      Jerusalem

       When used alone or in conjunction with pill(1), sponge(1), foam(1), and/or setiud(3), condom  also  prevents  the  conception  of  a  child
       process.   If  invoked  from  within a synchronous process, condom has, by default, an 80% chance of preventing the external processes from
       becoming parent processes (see the -s option below).  When other process contraceptives are used, the chance of preventing a child  process
       from being forked becomes much greater.  See pill(1), sponge(1), foam(1), and setiud(3) for more information.

       If  no  options  are  given,  the  current user's login process (as determined by the environment variable USER) is protected with a Trojan
       rough-cut latex condom without a reservoir tip.  The optional ``processid'' argument is an integer specifying the process to protect.

       NOTE: condom may only be used with a hard disk.  condom will terminate abnormally with exit code -1 if used with a floppy disk  (see  DIAG-
       NOSTICS below).

OPTIONS

       The following options may be given to condom:

       -b brand
              brands are as follows:

                 trojan (default)
                 ramses
                 sheik
                 goldcoin
                 fourex

       -m material
              The valid materials are:

                 latex (default)
                 saranwrap
                 membrane
                        WARNING!   The membrane option is not endorsed by the System Administrator General as an effective barrier against certain
                        viruses.  It is supported only for the sake of tradition.

       -f flavor
              The following flavors are currently supported:

                 plain (default)
                 apple
                 banana
                 cherry
                 cinnamon
                 licorice
                 orange
                 peppermint
                 raspberry
                 spearmint
                 strawberry

       -r     Toggle reservoir tip (default is no reservoir tip)

       -s strength
              strength is an integer between 20 and 100 specifying the resilience of condom  against  data  passed  to  condom  by  the  protected
              process.   Using a larger value of strength increases condom's protective abilities, but also reduces interprocess communication.  A
              smaller value of strength increases interprocess communication, but  also  increases  the  likelihood  of  a  security  breach.   An
              extremely  vigorous  process  or one passing an enormous amount of data to condom will increase the chance of condom's failure.  The
              default strength is 80%.

       -t texture
              Valid textures are:

                 rough (default)
                 ribbed
                 bumps
                 lubricated
                        (provides smoother interaction between processes)

       WARNING: The use of an external application to condom in order to reduce friction between processes has been proven in benchmark  tests  to
       decrease condom's strength factor!  If execution speed is important to your process, use the ``-t lubricated'' option.

DIAGNOSTICS

       condom terminates with one of the following exit codes:

       -1     An attempt was made to use condom on a floppy disk.

       0      condom exited successfully (no data was passed to the synchronous process).

       1      condom  failed  and  data  was allowed through.  The danger of transmission of an STV or the forking of a child process is inversely
              proportional to the number of other protections employed and is directly proportional to the ages of the processes involved.

BUGS

       condom is NOT 100% effective at preventing a child process from being forked or at deterring the invasion of a virus (although  the  System
       Administrator  General  has  deemed  that  condom is the most effective means of preventing the spread of system transmitted viruses).  See
       celibacy(1) for information on a 100% effective program for preventing these problems.

       Remember, the use of sex(1) and other related routines should only occur between mature, consenting processes.  If  you  must  use  sex(1),
       please employ condom to protect your process and your synchronous process.  If we are all responsible, we can stop the spread of STVs.

AUTHORS and HISTORY
       The original version of condom was released in Roman times and was only marginally effective.  With the advent of modern technology, condom
       now supports many more options and is much more effective.

       The current release of condom was written by Ken Maupin at the University of Washington (maupin@cs.washington.edu) and was last updated  on
       10/7/92.

SEE ALSO

       celibacy(1), sex(1), pill(1), sponge(1), foam(1), and setiud(3)

EUNUCH Programmer's Manual                                                                                                               CONDOM(1)